Drinkify: Your Newest Time-waster/Enabler

The hipster, techie, music-snob friend.  Everyone has one, and everyone wishes they didn’t.

Until now.  Because if that insufferable, condescending wretch of a friend wasn’t constantly tweeting tweetsh*t (or bulltweet?) about the next cool bla-bla-bla, you would never have heard about drinkify.org.

The concept is simple: Tell it what you’re listening to.  It’ll tell you what to drink while you listen.  And as the homepage is populated only by an “I’m listening to [BLANK]” prompt next to the “What should I drink?” button, it’s pretty much foolproof.  Once you tell Drinkify what you’re listening to, it whisks you away to another page with random album art, a random song (sometimes) from that artist, and a drink suggestion.

Surprisingly, you really can elicit a response for most artists and groups- those with at least a modicum of fame, that is.  Is your friend’s indie cover band on there? No.  Is your childhood favorite, Raffi, on there? Of course.  “The Raffi” is comprised of 1 oz. of Southern Comfort neat, garnished with pepper (Although I was hoping for something with Oople and Banoonoo liqueur).

Of course, the big ones are on there as well.  Everyone from Mozart to the The Temptations to Willy Nelson is spoken for.  You can even experiment with spoken word and podcasts: “The George Carlin” is simply 6 oz. of Jack Daniel’s served neat while “The NPR” is 12 oz. of raspberry vodka and 12 oz. of lemon juice served in a highball glass- a highball glass for GIANTS, that is!

The drink suggestions, as you may be able to tell from above examples, are not always practical.  “The Toby Keith” is 8 oz. of Maker’s Mark garnished with shrimp.  While disgusting, Toby Keith looks like the type of man who might enjoy his hard liquor with shellfish.

Impressively, though there are repeats, it appears that most of the pairings are thoughtful and not just randomly thrown together by a bot.  This is especially remarkable when you learn that this site was built in only 24 hours at a “hackathon”.  What is a hackathon?  How does the site actually work?  These are questions I absolutely do not know the answer to.  I googled them for about ten minutes and found nothing.

I do , however, know that Drinkify is a very silly, very stupid website that will almost surely dictate my libation decisions going forward.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go listen to the Glee cast as I… down a bottle of Macallan… served neat with a twist of grapefruit?  If you say so, Drinkify!


Your hipster, techie, music-snob friend,

~Don Julian

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