Starbucks: Beer & Wine Coming Soon

By , December 12, 2011 in Administrative

Starbucks is making a move to serve beer and wine in their stores across America. Apparently 6 stores located in the Pacific Northwest have been selling alcohol for some time and, according to the Seattle Times, the service has been a real success so far. As it is at Starbucks, beer and wine sales begin around 2PM with sales growth going into the double digits by 4PM. It’s been such a success that now the plan is to move the trend eastward beginning in Chicago next year. The idea is catching a lot of flack from groups across the board. Loyal patrons are concerned about what will happen to their neighborhood Starbucks and some, already disenchanted with the corporate giant, think the idea is another misstep. Personally, I’m all for it. In my neighborhood we have a coffee shop that serves great beer in bottles and on tap.  It’s a… Read More »

Twas a Discount

By , December 12, 2011 in Administrative

A poem for those who purchased gifts last year.   ‘Twas last year around Christmas, when you stopped out store. We’ve got new gifts this year, so stop by and by more “But my money,” you say, “On one hand I can count. I can’t afford a gift, not without a discount!”   And then in a twinkling, what should appear? But Boozin Bob, drunk, and drinking a beer Through bushes and shrubs he stumbles about. He trips and he falls then he lets out a shout.   “On Captain, on Crown, on Corona and Guinness, On Miller, on Molson, on Makers and Killians!” His crossed eyes – how they twinkled! His slurring – how merry! He shouted once more as far as his voice could carry,   “To customers of old! To friends of yesteryear! Happy Holidays, here’s a discount from your friends at Boozin Gear!” Check your emails,… Read More »

The 5 Hardest Drinkers in Hollywood History

By , November 28, 2011 in Administrative

Here’s a list of five great Hollywood icons who liked to have a few before the camera started rolling. We were going to find ten but we got shit-housed and lost the bottom part of the list, which we feel is keeping in spirit with those we are choosing to admire. Peter O’Toole – “Booze is the most outrageous of drugs, which is why I chose it.” One night Irish-born actor, Peter O’Toole,  was at a pub and, in order to continue drinking after last call, bought the place outright. Of course the next day he sobered up and, upon realizing what he had done, returned to the pub and tore up the check. He managed stayed friends with the pub owner up until his death. O’Toole arrived at the funeral a few sheets to the wind. After crying his eyes out, he realized he was at the wrong funeral…. Read More »

TV Drinking Games – The Top 20 of All Time

By , November 14, 2011 in Administrative, drinking game

TV drinking games are by far the most underrated drinking games of all time. Shows you like are better and shows you don’t like are all of the sudden interesting and hilarious. Of course TV drinking games usually involve about four hundred different rules with one sip, two sip, and finish your beer categories. We’ve gone and solved that by boiling things down to a few simple rules per show, but don’t worry, you’ll still be slurring your favorite TV catch phrases. So turn on your TV. Drinking games begin now. Scrubs – Drink every time JD has a fantasy, Dr. Cox has a rant or Elliott has a nervous breakdown. The Office – Drink anytime you see Michael’s “World’s Greatest Boss” mug, Jim looks at the camera, or something “office-inappropriate” happens. Family Guy – Drink anytime there’s a flashback, a song, or a reference to a TV show that… Read More »

Beer Types!

By , November 11, 2011 in Administrative

Beer Types! The beer gods hath sent forth some unknown prophet to guide us with this document! Not since the ten commandments has a document so monumental to the human race been etched into existence. Not since the Rosetta stone has a document cleared up so much mystery and made so many unknown truths known. Not since the hubble telescope’s mapping of the galaxies, has a chart contained the directions, the means and the information to guide men into unknown territory! This is the map Captain Kirk would use were he navigating his way through beer space. This is the chart John Nash would use were he decoding a Russian attempt to use beer types to build a weapon of mass destruction. This is the divine article of beer types that very well may save America Democracy! And it was good…

Drinkify: Your Newest Time-waster/Enabler

The hipster, techie, music-snob friend.  Everyone has one, and everyone wishes they didn’t. Until now.  Because if that insufferable, condescending wretch of a friend wasn’t constantly tweeting tweetsh*t (or bulltweet?) about the next cool bla-bla-bla, you would never have heard about drinkify.org. The concept is simple: Tell it what you’re listening to.  It’ll tell you what to drink while you listen.  And as the homepage is populated only by an “I’m listening to [BLANK]” prompt next to the “What should I drink?” button, it’s pretty much foolproof.  Once you tell Drinkify what you’re listening to, it whisks you away to another page with random album art, a random song (sometimes) from that artist, and a drink suggestion. Surprisingly, you really can elicit a response for most artists and groups- those with at least a modicum of fame, that is.  Is your friend’s indie cover band on there? No.  Is your… Read More »

Captain Morgans Story

By , November 9, 2011 in Administrative

Captain Morgans story is as awesome as it is old and who better to tell you about it then an actual pirate? Here’s a guest column from gentlemen pirate, Captain Flint Rackham. “Alrighty me sprogs, ye want to learn about the great, grand story o’ Captain Morgans? Well that be just splendid. The captain was right smart and right ambitious as any bastard to ev’r cross the blue, blue ocean. He hailed from Welsh-country and knew little of the sweet trade. Course that didn’t stop him from joinin’ up and trying to invade Hispaniola at the ripe old age o’ twenty. As a Captain, he be no lily-livered girl scout handin’ out flyers lookin’ for good pirates. The captain sailed all around the Caribbean in red silk and gold jewels, shellin’ out doubloons like pieces o’ eight so he might attract the best pirates to join em’ in his plunderin’…. Read More »

The History of Beer

By , November 7, 2011 in Administrative, beer history

The history of beer found in most places is long, wordy, and pretentious. What we have here is a concise and friendly guide to the history of beer, fit for reading on a coffee break. Of course if you want to read the full chronology we recommend Ian Horney’s book, A History of Beer and Brewing. It ain’t cheap but if you’re serious it’s worth buying. Meanwhile here’s a guide for the rest of us who’d like to be a little savvier but would rather drink beer than read a textbook about it. Brewing beer is an ancient tradition that began almost 10,000 years ago. Back then beer was a sludgy, rancid concoction akin to oatmeal.  It was really just food with alcohol in it, like a sloshy rum cake. The recipe was meant to keep grain from going bad, so that people could eat in the winter. The first… Read More »

The Final Boozinween: What You Thought of my Halloween Costume

F*ck what you think of my Halloween costume. “That’s not gonna get you laid.” So what? Let’s be honest. This is a holiday. Not only that; this is a drinking holiday, and maybe you’re sexy when you drink, but me? I’m just tactless and smelly. Tactless and Smelly wasn’t gettin’ laid tonight anyway. “It’s not practical.” Practical? Practical?! It’s Halloween and you’re worried about practical?! Talk to the guy in the banana suit about practical. See if the Green Man who isn’t wearing his corrective lenses is worried about practical. F*ck what you think of my Halloween costume. “I don’t think people are going to get it.” Oh, I’m sorry, you’re totally right. Let me go change. I’m sure I have a Steve Jobs costume here somewhere. Or a Wall Street Occupier. You know- something topical that nobody else else is gonna dress as. “What’s topical about your costume?” “DO… Read More »

Occupy Ale Street

By , November 4, 2011 in Administrative, microbrew

The economy has taken a turn for the worst and people everywhere are feeling the sting of a lengthy and unforgiving recession, but no one is feeling it as hard as the beer industry spokespeople. The Budweiser frogs have been bouncing from gig to gig, the Labatt Blue Bear has been on unemployment for three years now and Keith Stone is barely making rent. The downturn has even had a negative effect on other related industries as with Captain Morgan who lost all his booty in Bernie Madoff’s Ponzi scheme. As these mascots suffer, so do the loyal patrons of the brands they represent. Overall it’s a dark time for the industry that many thought was recession-proof. Meanwhile, microbreweries and their benefactors are living like fat cats on Bourbon Street. Last year, craft brewers sold an estimated 9.9 million barrels of beer in 2010, up from 8.9 million in 2009,… Read More »