Naturally, there’s the classic Black and Tan. Traditionally, the B&T is made with Guinness and Bass. The drink works because pale ale is heavier than stout. If you fill a glass halfway with pale ale then carefully pour stout on top, the stout will literally float on top. Not only does the drink look cool, it’s quite tasty, too. If you try this yourself, you probably want to use a spoon to slow the stout down so it won’t mix with the pale ale. Pouring it over the curved back of the spoon should do the trick. There are tools made for this very purpose which mount on the rim of the glass that make the pour a lot easier.

The Black and Red is like the B&T except in the beer styles used. The best option is a framboise lambic topped with a chocolate stout. This decadent drink tastes like chocolate covered berries in liquid form.

The Stout Sangria was originally designed to be a Christmas drink but it’s good anytime. Besides, this day when stout is the star seems like the perfect day to whip up the drink. To make it you’ll need:
One bottle of dry stout
1/2 ounce of simple syrup
1/2 ounce of ruby port
Cinnamon or nutmeg for garnish
Fill the glass about 3/4 full with the stout. Add the syrup and port then top it up with the rest of the beer. Sprinkle the spice of your choice on top. Drink. Enjoy. Repeat.

The final stout cocktail comes from our favorite guru of cocktails, Colleen Graham. She recently published this recipe for Apple Cider Shandy. It’s an easy drink to make - the best always are, aren’t they? Pour about half an oatmeal stout in a glass. Top it with an ounce of cider. Colleen recommends soft, nonalcoholic, sparkling cider. The flavor of hard cider is too harsh, she says, and will overwhelm the drink. I haven’t tried this one yet but I look forward to experimenting with it to find which cider is my favorite in it.

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But that didn’t stop some brewers, whose eyes are perhaps fixed a little too firmly on the numbers, from trying to win the crown as brewers of the world’s strongest beer. The latest holder of that title is BrewDog in Scotland. Now, don’t get me wrong. I like BrewDog. I’ve enjoyed the few beers made by them that I’ve been able to try and I like their approach of bringing the spirit of the American craft brew scene to UK.

But a 41% alcohol beer? That’s just taking things a bit too far. Clearly, some distillation has happened. I haven’t checked their website for info on this brew but as they’ve been very open in the past, I have not doubt that the brewers at BrewDog described exactly how they produced this “beer.”

It’s not really beer, is it? Whisky with a hops garnish is more appropriate of a name.

I’m not sure why this irritates me. Probably because it seems less like innovative brewing - distillation was cracked centuries ago - and more like a marketing stunt. One can’t really fault BrewDog for this strategy. Poking the establishment drinks industry and neo-prohibitionists in the eye has been their approach since the beginning. And an incredibly successful one, too. For a brewery that’s just around three years old, BD has grown at a fantastic rate.

I’d just like to see the BrewDog brewers going back to brewing.

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Here’s to me and here’s to you,
And here’s to love and laughter.
I’ll be true as long as you,
And not one moment after.

Practice makes perfect,
There’s many do think,
But a man’s not too perfect
When he’s practiced at drink!

Here’s to a long life and a merry one,
A quick death and an easy one,
A pretty girl and an honest one,
A cold pint and another one!

When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to Heaven.
So let’s all get drunk and go to Heaven!

If you cheat, may you cheat death.
If you steal, may you steal a woman’s heart.
If you fight, may you fight for a brother.
And if you drink, may you drink with me!

It is better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow,
Than to spend tonight like there’s no money!

Here’s to the land of the shamrock so green,
Here’s to each lad and his darlin’ Colleen,
Here’s to the ones we love dearest and most.
May God bless old Ireland, that’s this Irishman’s toast!

I have known many and liked not a few,
But loved only one, and this toast is to you.

May your thoughts be as glad as the shamrocks.
May your heart be as light as a song.
May each day bring you bright, happy hours
That stay with you all the year long.

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Why am I talking to you about this now? Well, the day is exactly one month from today, giving you four weeks to get your shit together and order a t-shirt or, better yet a full on St. Paddy’s day costume like this one so you can celebrate in style. Remember last year? You meant to pick up a shirt or hat showing your love of things Irish, your love of Guinness or whatever unrelated beer into which you dump green food dye every March 17. (I still don’t get why you do that!)

You meant to do it, but you didn’t. So you had to be a douche and go out drinking in whatever non-St. Patrick’s Day clothing you pulled out of your closet. And no one spoke to you, did they? No, they didn’t because they knew that you really didn’t care about our beautiful day dedicated to Irishness and booziness.

Well, not this year. Stop what you’re doing and head over to the store side of this website and get some St. Paddy’s gear. Do it now.

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But there’s something about these significant days that seems to make it so we pop the cork on a bottle of bubbly, or at least wine, right? At the same time, a bottle of Champagne and a box of chocolates is so expected that it’s almost cliché. While I feel compelled to by a bottle of Champagne, I also feel a little silly taking it to the cashier.

Clearly, I have some unresolved issues surrounding sparkling wine.

And, by the way, that is usually what I really buy. As you probably know, it isn’t really Champagne unless it comes from the Champagne region of France. Otherwise, it’s sparkling wine. So why do I tend to buy sparkling wine over Champagne? Well, it has nothing to do with it being from France. I’ll buy wine, cheese and anything else tempting from France. It goes back to the idea that Champagne is cliché. I’m looking for something different and usually that will come from the non-French speaking vintners who aren’t quite so steeped in tradition.

One option is local wine. Living in Missouri, I have lots of options for local wine. There are dozens of small, family run wineries within just a few hours drive from my house and the booze store is always stocked with a wide selection of them. One popular local sparkling wine is called Ten Bucks. The label features a pen and ink cartoon drawing of ten male deer. It really takes the wind out of the hoity image of Champagne. Oh, and it sells for $10.

Another option that my wife particularly favors is Italian Muscato d’Asti. This full flavored sparkling wine is a very nice alternative to Champagne. Where the traditional bubbly seems only to offer the choice of excessively sweet or excessive dry and always watery, Muscato d’Asti is always flavorful and satisfying. And it’s definitely priced more reasonably than the French stuff with all of its commercial cache.

Or maybe this year I will finally resist the urge and just go with good beer. So long as I don’t forget the chocolate, I think my wife will be fine with that.

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The great thing about mixed drinks is that you can create any flavor or experience that you want. From fruity drinks to dark, decadent libations, cocktails have it all. And talk about elegance! A well made cocktail makes for an impressive presentation.

One thing, especially for the newbie, if you decide that you’re going to take the evening in this direction makes sure that you know beforehand what drinks you plan to make. Read the recipes carefully and be certain that you understand them; maybe even take a couple of dry (well, wet) runs before. You don’t want your drinks to fall flat.

Okay, so what cocktails to make? Whenever I think cocktails, I turn to my buddy and mixology guru Colleen Graham. For Valentine’s Day she recommends a bunch of tempting drinks. Some of my favorites are the fruity and fragrant Blushing Geisha, the Champagne simplicity of Axis Kiss, or the always sure to please Death by Chocolate. Check out the rest of Colleen’s Valentine’s Day recommendations.

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Today we’ll begin with the most unlikely of adult beverages, beer. For those of you for whom beer means the cheapest case of cans filled with piss water - you know who you are - beer might not be the most romantic of drinks.

What is romantic? Is it elegance? Beer’s got elegance. Some of the top shelf craft and import beers are pure elegance. They range in intensity from delicate to bold with a whole palate of flavors from light and fruity to big roasty stouts to funky sour beers.

And the packaging; special release beers these days rival the finest champagnes with magnum bottles, wired down corks and striking labels. For a lot less money, one can pick up a fine bottle of beer that rivals the best wines in flavor, presentation and appearance.

Finally, does a romantic encounter always involve a box of chocolates for you? Chocolate and beer go great together. From the rich, coffee-like flavors of good stout to the tart, fruity flavors of lambic, there is plenty of fine beer that will go very nicely with the box of chocolates.

Or, just get chocolate beer! There is some great chocolate beer out there. Buy a bunch of individual bottles and see which one is you and your lover’s favorite.

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A well made Cab is deep and rich in flavor. It’s usually got just enough complexity without being annoying. And a good Cab goes with most of those rich comfort foods like soups, pasta dishes and breads that seem to taste even better when it’s cold outside.

A lot of people are intimidated to try to pick out a wine if they are unfamiliar with them. Don’t be. There are lots and lots of wineries in the world which means that everyone is faced with dozens and dozens of choices when they are searching for wine. That there are so many also means that even the most educated wine geek doesn’t know them all. In other words, no one knows for sure that this or the other wine is the absolute best choice.

When buying wine for the first time:
Read the labels - winemakers typically write honest, if a little flowery, descriptions of their wine on the bottle. They don’t want to misrepresent and they want consumers to have a clear choice.

Ask for help - the clerk at the wine shop is there for just this reason. Having been one myself for a few years in the nineties, I can tell you that a really interested customer with lots of questions is the highlight of the day. I would always much rather talk about wine then go into the backroom and work on inventory!

Experiment - the only real way to learn about wine is to taste it!

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But when thinking of cold weather booze I have to mention this beloved brown liquor. When it comes to whiskey, it’s all good - Irish, Scotch or Bourbon.

Each one has it’s own tradition and the difference in flavors is remarkable, as much among the three distinct styles as among the various distilleries that make them.

I like to keep it simple with whisky. I typically drink it over ice but when I’ve just had enough with the cold, I just add water at about 50/50 proportions. Simple, tasty and warming.

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The difference between stout and porter is almost indistinguishable these days. There are so many variations on each - chocolate, coffee, sweet, imperial, etc. - that both styles manage to cover the spectrum of dark beer tastes. One general truth remains - porters, like most other beer styles, rely on hops to balance the natural sweetness of beer while stouts include a type of dark roasted barley that contributes a particular sort of bitterness along with hops. It’s a subtle difference that’s difficult to distinguish in the glass.

Dry stouts, of which Guinness Extra Stout is an example, are my favorite. Many breweries brew a dry stout all year long but even if they don’t, they often will introduce a seasonal dry stout in January or February in anticipation of St. Patrick’s Day in March. So, I have plenty of dry stout options to choose from during these cold months.

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