Category:  halloween

The Final Boozinween: What You Thought of my Halloween Costume

F*ck what you think of my Halloween costume. “That’s not gonna get you laid.” So what? Let’s be honest. This is a holiday. Not only that; this is a drinking holiday, and maybe you’re sexy when you drink, but me? I’m just tactless and smelly. Tactless and Smelly wasn’t gettin’ laid tonight anyway. “It’s not practical.” Practical? Practical?! It’s Halloween and you’re worried about practical?! Talk to the guy in the banana suit about practical. See if the Green Man who isn’t wearing his corrective lenses is worried about practical. F*ck what you think of my Halloween costume. “I don’t think people are going to get it.” Oh, I’m sorry, you’re totally right. Let me go change. I’m sure I have a Steve Jobs costume here somewhere. Or a Wall Street Occupier. You know- something topical that nobody else else is gonna dress as. “What’s topical about your costume?” “DO… Read More »

Boozinween: Alternatives to Slutty

“I hate Halloween.” Not my words, but the words of a female friend of mine. “There’s all this pressure to wear something slutty and whatever I dress up as, I always feel homely compared to the other girls.” “Untrue”, I said! Only the most boring and vapid of women wear slutty costumes for Halloween these days. Guys are going to hate me for saying this, but ladies, you have options now! It’s 2011! Betty White is a sex icon! (Isn’t she? I’m pretty sure she is.) And just in case you’re too busy to explore or discover these options, I’ve listed a number of them below for your convenience. So without further ado… ways to dress on Halloween if you feel slutty is “so ninth grade”: hot — sexy — skimpy — voluptuous — suggestive — naked — titillating — sensuous– like you’re going to the club — racy —… Read More »

More unsolicited Halloween party advice

In case you missed, yesterday I decided to start dolling out advice for your Halloween parties this weekend. I did this without caring at all whether or not you actually want my advice. And today my advice – and apathy of your opinion of it – continues: Bring a buddy. I’m not telling you to bring a designated driver. If you haven’t clued in to that yet, then you’re too stupid to get it if I tell you one more time. What I’m telling you here is to bring someone with you who can and will tell you when you’ve had enough even if you don’t want to hear it. Plus, with a buddy along it’s more fun to laugh at the drunken idiot showing his ass out. Don’t be a douche. The ongoing rule of the Boozin’ Blog about drinking certainly applies to Halloween parties – Don’t be a… Read More »

Unsolicited Halloween party advice

For those of us without young kids, Halloween has increasingly become a chance to party. There really couldn’t be a better time of the year for it, especially outdoor parties. The weather is cool, odds of rain are fairly low and the summer bugs are gone. Perfect for lighting a bonfire and drinking the night away. Plus, this year finds us with a Sunday Halloween meaning that there are likely two or even three Halloween parties on our calendars. So, we here at the Boozin’ Blog thought that this would be a good time to offer a little unsolicited party advice. We don’t have any problems with your boozing it up; in fact we encourage it. But, keep a few these few things in mind while you’re doing it. Eat. It wouldn’t be a party without nibblies about. Use them to pace yourself and make sure that you’ve got something… Read More »