Mardi Gras is on Tuesday, Februany 21st (That was no typo. Iâ€™m gunning for a sponsorship- Subway, can you hear meee?). For the next week, the Boozinâ€™ Blog will be counting down the days until the holiday of holidays, festival of drunks (and culture, if youâ€™re looking for that sort of thing) with a few doâ€™s and dontâ€™s weâ€™ve learned over the years.
These “do’s” and “don’t's” are becoming decreasingly useful as the weekend progresses. Anyone actually visiting New Orleans for Mardi Gras will be spending very little time on the internet and very much time too drunk to operate Google.Â With that in mind, this one goes out to those of us stranded in the rest of the world:
- Using your favorite web browser (Netscape Navigator, Internet Explorer; you can choose from so many), type “maps.google.com” into the address bar.
- Type “Bourbon and Canal New Orleans, LA” into the search bar.
- Click on streetview.
- Â Take a stroll.
Some things, you’ll notice, are missing. Massive crowds, for instance. The smell of hand grenades, the smell of vomit (Clearly, Google prefer things to be accurate than awesome or else they would have sent their Streetview fairies down Bourbon Street on Mardi Gras).
There are, however, some familiar, comforting landmarks:
-The Hustler Club. Too sober to visit when you get to Bourbon Street. Too broke to visit when you leave. I prefer Krystal Burger. I don’t know how big Huster is, but Krystal boasts THREE FLOORS OF SEATING.
-A Hustler Clu- wait, what? That’s anotherÂ Hustler Club!
Speaking of repetition…
-YOU get a daquiri!
-YOU get a daquiri!
-YOU get a daquiri and I’m throwin’ in ANOTHER BEER TRUCK!
Bottom Line: Even though the people and the beads and the boobs might not be present, Bourbon Streetview has plenty of nostalgia to dole out, so if you find yourself missing the debauchery of the Crescent City, pay it a virtual visit. If you do, be sure to come find me.
I’m right by the daquiri place.