Fashion is the true king of beers.
Ã¢â‚¬Å“This Autumn, ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s AAALLLLL about maple syrup!Ã¢â‚¬Â says beer fashionista, Pepe VelÃƒÂ¡zquez. He points out a new brew with a truly chic label. Ã¢â‚¬Å“This beer is a pale ale infused with dead leaves. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s not particularly appetizing, but nowadays who really cares?Ã¢â‚¬Â
VelÃƒÂ¡zquez is a leader in the craft beer movement known as hopheads. According to hopheads beer isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t about having flavor; itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s about being fabulous. He makes sense of it like this, Ã¢â‚¬Å“Drinking a beer just because you like how it tastes is like waking up in the morning and putting on clothes because they fit you. Beer like an outfit needs to have sass and it needs to have class.Ã¢â‚¬Â
This season dark ales are big as are beers containing exciting flavors like aged pumpkin, acorn squash and maple syrup. Whether or not the flavors are good or not is irrelevant. Being as interesting as possible is what counts.
As VelÃƒÂ¡zquez says, Ã¢â‚¬Å“When you are squeezing yourself into a pair of high heels do you think Ã¢â‚¬Ëœthis is uncomfortableÃ¢â‚¬â„¢? No! You think, Ã¢â‚¬ËœWith these heels on I will be beautiful and people will see me and they will think, Ã¢â‚¬Ëœthat man is beautiful.Ã¢â‚¬â„¢ As will you drink a fall brew infused with pumpkin extract and ginseng and think Ã¢â‚¬ËœSureÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ this does not taste so good but see how magnificent I look.Ã¢â‚¬Â
As important as being interesting is being in season. Ã¢â‚¬Å“You wouldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t wear white after Labor Day so why would you commit such a beer faux pas as drinking a winter brew when itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s only October,Ã¢â‚¬Â explains VelÃƒÂ¡zquez. Ã¢â‚¬Å“ThatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s like wearing a blue scarf in November. How ridiculous!Ã¢â‚¬Â
Since our introduction, Pepe and I have begun talking about how to fix my style to be more in accordance with the hophead vogue. Thanks to him and the modern beer industry this autumn IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll be in a pastel turtleneck sipping on a Rogue Mocha Porter out of a vintage champagne flute for maximum palette contact. Then, come winter, IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll be at the local tavern in an Armani sleeveless Eskimo jacket drinking a Sam SmithÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s Winter Welcome. VelÃƒÂ¡zquez advises men everywhere to do the same Ã¢â‚¬Å“lest they look positively preposterous.Ã¢â‚¬Â
I asked VelÃƒÂ¡zquez what he thought of people who say beer is about style not about gimmicks and Ã¢â‚¬Å“fashion.Ã¢â‚¬Â He responded with this, Ã¢â‚¬Å“How are breweries supposed to make money selling the same beer all year? Sell good beer?Ã¢â‚¬Â
acorn squash armani beer industry champagne champagne flute craft beer movement dark ales dead leaves eskimo flavors ginseng hopheads king of beers maple syrup pale ale pumpkin extract true king turtleneck vintage waking up in the morning winter brew